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Clean Sheets-ology November 2006 Forecast
by Nola Summers
(11/01/06)
The Full Moon on November 5th bends the limits you impose on yourself -- just what will you do to get between the set of thighs attached to the ass you really want? What if all you have to do to stay there on a regular basis is go all the way south...hmm...and you've told every one that you don't do that, or don't swallow, or only do it when there's a blue moon. That's what bedroom doors are for -- to keep what you think need to be secrets in and keep everyone else out. Mercury conjunct Venus on the 7th helps you find the right words when you finally come up for air because you are going there. Mars square Neptune on the 17th brings hazy thoughts to the forefront. It's the difference between thinking something might feel good and knowing why in the long run it won't. The New Moon in Scorpio on the 20th draws the thinnest of lines between lust and the implementation of fantasy, so make it a point to check which side of the line you've landed on when you wake up in the middle of the night.... Oh yes, you did do that; with any luck you'll be left wondering why you didn't do it sooner.
Aries (March 21 -- April 19) Attempting to stay focused is trial enough for you as you sometimes forget why you're flirting with one person and start up with another. If the route from point A (flirting) to point C (in bed) is through point B (flattery and general line-stringing) then don't go through X, Y, and Z on your way there. No one is in the mood to hang around waiting this month -- stay on point.
Taurus (April 20 -- May 20) Sometimes doing your own thing does involve batteries, lubrication, and a dose of imagination. Sometimes it's admitting to yourself that short wide-beamed women in very high heels are what really turns you on. Accepting what makes you tick might be difficult but if it looks like a wide-beamed woman in high heels, and it walks like a wide-beamed woman in high heels, and it makes your dick hard or your pussy wet -- then you should follow it home. Don't waste time trying to fit your round self into someone else's square hole.
Gemini (May21 -- June 20) Baby, it's good to be the both of you. Finally, the Twins have found that special someone who is on the same page as them -- and without that much gentle redirection. Why the hesitation? Talk amongst yourselves and decide the perfect time to let go. You won't hit the floor before one of you catches the other. And there is no better place to fall than face first into the pillows -- asses up: the one that wants it and the one that says you should wait to see if the time is right. The time is right; just relax and let things happen.
Cancer (June 21 -- July 22) You didn't slip between those sheets because you had nowhere else to go did you? What now? No matter what you've heard, whether you've been there for one night or forty nights, there is no graceful exit from this sticky wet-spot sort of situation. Look at it this way -- you know you've got to go, and on making your exit you'll take with you a real clear picture of what you don't want, because you've just had that. Time to change things up and it's not a change until you do it; before that it's wishful thinking.
Leo (July 23 -- August 22) You've got the attention, the gifts, exactly what you thought you wanted, but if it isn't all about you, what is it about? It's not like you to ponder deeper subjects. As Mercury goes direct on the 17th it may be of benefit to spend some time thinking about your emotional and spiritual insides as opposed to your usual concern of what or who you can get physically inside yourself. Don't even try to pretend that it's only ever been fingers, tongues, and dicks all up in there; life's a stage and everything's a prop. You know that and we know that about you. It's Chi checking time.
Virgo (August 23 -- September 22) Take a moment to listen to the noises and sounds that emanate from the object of your physical ministrations. In more basic terms, speak less and listen more to the groans and moans of the person you're fucking. There's much to learn about where exactly their come trigger is; that sharp little intake of breath and almost silent lip-lick. It's all there if you take the time to find it. Remember, it's rarely what you say that counts; it's what you don't say that tells the biggest tale. Let them tell you a story in sweet low moans and murmured vibrations...
Libra (September 23 -- October 22) Oh, oh...you've got that itch again (no not that itch) and it's all you can do to not dump them for no other reason than something's bugging you. You'll be better off just taking a little "you" vacation. Get away and expand your vision, your world, and your experiences. Bring them back a little something (no, not that), and if you do bring back a spectacular new move you've learned on your travels, wait a bit before the big demonstration. Don't even slide a leg in a different direction. You don't stand a chance of convincing them you just happened to read it in the airline magazine that was stuffed in next to the airsick bag.
Scorpio (October 23 -- November 21) As usual you stop short of totally committing. You do have a terrible reputation for messing about but it's not that. You love to keep that little emotional brick in the misguided thought that if you keep just a little bit back then they can't hurt you -- yeah, that'll work. Holding back does more harm than you think -- it makes you miss that exciting freefall of trust. Try something new and see if you can move from doubtful to liking to loving it. Yes it will fit, with trust...and lubrication.
Sagittarius (November 22 -- December 21) Again with the things from the past; done is done so let it go. If you find yourself screwing them for revenge over and over just so you can prove to them that you don't care you might as well just go back to doing them full-time. Sometimes you have to forgive to forget. Try this line, "I'm not doing this anymore and I forgive you for being a total prick." Now turn around, look over there, and size up the one that's sizing you up. Totally into you now that you're able to move ahead and recognize it. .
Capricorn (December 22 -- January 19) You don't even like Star Trek so why are you on deck and why is Jean Luc Picard eyeballing you and mind-probing you like the king of the Borg and why are you coming? Which as usual has awoken you from an odd but sexy dream: what was that all about? Good news is that you don't have to go warp speed to the galaxies and beyond but you should pay attention to what your dreams are trying to tell you. Before you spend an excessive amount of time on shaved and sexy sites, you could simply make an effort to expand your horizons.
Aquarius (January 20 -- February 18) Remember when times were tough and you spent all day in bed drinking cheap red wine out of paper cups and watching reruns on TV because between the two of you, you couldn't afford to do anything else? Thing was, you came 14 times, you were sore in all the right places, and slept like a baby afterwards; time to go back to basics and find the little things that are missing now.
Pisces (February 19 -- March 20) Pisces natives on occasion, because they are very easy going, tend to sit back and let things stay as they are. If things aren't so bad you let it go -- sometimes you can't be bothered, other times you don't want to upset someone else. This month with all the energy that's flying around it's time to get up off your butt and visit new places and new people. The world does not come to those who wait -- unless you've got a big bowl of candy and you're expecting the next door neighbor to show up dressed as a French maid and offer you a trick and a treat...wait that was last month...so no, the world does not come to those who wait. Go grab life by the nipples and don't let go even if they say it hurts; they'll get used to it.
©2006 by Nola Summers
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Nola Summers combined honest-to-goodness research with time spent on her back gazing at the heavens, and came up with a few ideas of her own on the sexual ins and outs of our individual astrological signs. Her work is never-ending as the stars and planets continue to move across the sky pulling unsuspecting lovers in their wake. She is a Contributing Editor and Astrologer for Clean Sheets and the Book Reviews Editor for Pulp Magazine. You are invited to visit her teeny tiny MySpace space and her Web site.
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