compiled by Brian Peters
(07/24/02)

Lustful, passionate, joyous, deeply personal, intimately shared, and -- wholesome? Such are the contradictions of an erotic recipe collection. This annual roundup has become a reader favorite and much beloved by the Clean Sheets staff; so popular, in fact, that we published Blow Jobs and Lemon Kisses: the Clean Sheets Cookbook for Sex to make it more accessible and portable, and we will undoubtedly be revising and expanding the book to include the many things we're drooling over in this year's article.

Food is deeply wired into our conscious and unconscious selves, and, after all, essential to our very survival. But these recipes go far beyond survival to satisfy a whole array of other passions. We have cherry pie to inspire ecstatic devotion; diet dessert to die for; dips and chains; Carabaccia to slowly explore; finger foods for your every digital fetish; almond biscotti to transport coffee to paradise; apple tatin to explain what Eve was really up to; pasta and pesto salad that's only the beginning of an erotic journey; asparagus-tomato salad inspired by a sensual garden; chicken and sun-dried tomatoes sauce for those sticky and intense times; aphrodisiac mussels that, well, speak for themselves; and erotic drinks to sip as you settle back to contemplate your sensual journey.

Bon Appétit.

Susie Belle's Eternal Cherry Devotion Pie

--Susie Bright

Caveat:

Sometimes you need to make a meal that will make someone fall in love with you. Sometime you need a dessert with an enchantment so strong that your lover will never leave you, no matter what the temptation. When you're ready for such a strong potion, you need to make Susie Belle's Eternal Cherry Devotion Pie.

Don't make this pie if you're just toying with someone -- you'll be sorry. Don't make this pie for your lover if you don't want them by your side forever, and moaning at your grave when you're gone. This is serious stuff.

On the other hand, if you make it for children, it will simply make their cheeks glow and put a spring in their step, so that's one way to play it safe.

Fresh cherry pie tastes absolutely nothing like canned cherry filling -- it has no more in common with such a recipe than it does with laundry detergent.

Cherries are only truly in season in the first few weeks of summer, so this pie can only be prepared in early June if its to have its intended effect.

Directions

Get 3 pounds of cherries, half of them the dark red bing, and half of them the yellow (Queen Anne 9 sometimes called Rainier).

Pit them, and then let them soak in a mixture of tapioca (3 T.) sugar (3/4 cup) a splash of brandy, a pinch of cinnamon and allspice, two teaspoons of lemon juice, a teaspoon of lemon zest, and a drop of almond extract.

While they're soaking, make your pie crust:

Fill a glass of water with mostly ice and let sit for later.

Put 2 1/2 c. high protein white flour, 2 T. sugar, and 1 tsp. salt in Cuisinart. Pulse to mix them.

Then chip in pat-size slices of 12 T. unsalted butter into the food processor, and give it 6 or 7 one-second pulses, so that the butter is cut in, but still has odd lumps and pea-size bits. The mixture should be irregular, that's what makes it flakey.

Add blobs of Crisco ( 8 T.) and do another 5 pulses or so.

Turn dough into large bowl. Go get your glass of now-perfect ice water. Sprinkle 6 T of the ice water into the dry mixture, just a little at a time, and mix in each splash with a rubber spatula. Keep sprinkling and mixing several drops at a time, turning the bowl. The whole point is to not just dump the water in one place and then try to work it in -- it won't be even, and you'll end up adding too much water.

Now your dough is ready to roll. Pat it into two balls, press each into a six inch or so disc, and wrap in separate wax paper and put it in the fridge for at least a half hour.

Unfold one of the dough discs onto a breadboard size piece of wax paper. (Leave second in fridge.) Lay it on a flat surface. Now put another same-size piece of wax paper on top. The disc of dough is sandwiched in between the two pieces of wax paper. Your rolling pin will never touch the dough while you're rolling it out.

Take a rolling pin and roll a few decisive strokes from the center in each direction. After a few strokes, lift the wax paper off the dough and turn it upside down on the other sheaf of wax paper. Keep doing this rolling and lifting so that the dough never sticks to the paper. You won't need to add extra flour.

Remember the dough is thickest in the middle, so always roll from the middle out. Make it about a 12 inch circle, or an inch or so bigger than your pie pan.

Remove the top sheet of wax paper and take the bottom one that has the dough on it, and lay it upside down over your pie pan. Peel the paper off the back, and settle the pie dough into the pan.

Pour your cherry melange into the pie shell and put in the refrigerator. Take the other disc of dough out -- you're going to make the top lattice crust now.

Roll out just as you did for the bottom crust. When you have your 12 inch circle, take a knife and cut the dough vertically into half inch strips.

Here's the big secret about lattice crusts: yes, you can be crafty and do it so that it is a perfect basket weave. But who cares.

The thing is, it looks totally adorable no matter how you lay the strips down, and it's actually more personal to just make it up yourself. Meditate on your beloved, and lay down the strips any way you choose so that the topping is basically covered, with little peek a boo holes between the strips.

Bake at 400 for 20 minutes.

Turn down heat to 350 and bake another 30 minutes. Cool pie on rack for an hour. Now you can eat the whole thing at once.

--Susie Bright

Diet Dessert

I swore off diets years ago, but a recent health problem forced me to lose a little weight. Since a staple of my diet is ice cream -- its cool, smooth sweetness never fails to put me into a sensual mood -- I made a substitute that works just as well:

Take one package of sugar-free chocolate pudding and make according to directions. Layer in dessert dishes with equal amounts of frozen Cool Whip.

The Cool Whip is almost hard, the pudding soft and creamy. Can be slathered on various body parts and licked off, or eaten with a spoon.

--Marcy Sheiner

Dips as Desired (Guacamole and Melitzanasalata)

Bind your favourite meal, face up, by her (I assume, from my own preferences: please change gender according to yours)...her wrists and ankles to the four corners of the kitchen table. Kiss her eyes.

Halve two big aubergines, and while they're in the oven for half an hour make the guacamole.... Work between her legs. When you're not using the knife, lay it somewhere slightly dangerous, or at least provocative.

Chop the innards of two large or three medium avocados, plus half an onion, two cloves of garlic, a teaspoonful of paprika (or to taste). Place in a blender with one tablespoon of extra virgin olive oil. Blend, baby, blend. Discuss whether there's a vibrator attachment available for the machine.

Untie her right hand, explain how busy you are, and place her hand where it's most wanted. No, not there: where she most wants it.

Taste the guacamole. Add more paprika, probably. If it looks a little dry, add some more olive oil and blend, blend, blend.

Set aside in a bowl. Discuss desire, garlic and the influence of heat.

The aubergines should be cooked now. A bit squashy. If they aren't, indulge yourself with that woman on the table, but keep your eye on the time.

Eventually, scour out the pulpy flesh of the aubergines into cubes. Hand-mix with a crushed clove of garlic, spoon in extra virgin olive oil a little at a time till you get a gooey, lumpy mix.

Now you have two dips: guacamole, and melitzanasalata (it's all Greek to me, when it's not Spanish). Some prefer them cooled in the fridge, but you probably can't wait. So start warming some pita bread.

Tips on presentation: there are two shapely mounds on the woman on the kitchen table. Why not spoon one dip over each of them? Remove pita bread from the oven. Make sure it's warm, not hot. Lift her head. Dip pita in cunt, preferably wet, but these things can't always be prescribed. Use the pita to scoop up a little of each dip, and feed to her, then to yourself, unless you're feeling greedy and ruthless, in which case, vice versa. Supplement with cool dry white wine. Repeat as desired.

As desired.

As desired.

--Patricio

Carabaccia (sweet onion soup)

Even the sound of the name is sexy -- say it over and over to your lover or yourself, softly, with your eyes closed. Soft a's. Carabaaaaccia.

This delicate soup is straightforward to prepare, but fit for a gourmet dinner -- and yet so filling, that you may want to eat nothing else.

The recipe serves six (if you're feeling adventurous), but if there's just two or three of you, then you can make it last a long, long time...

Note: It's important not to rush the cooking -- I'm sure you can find something to occupy your time while the almonds are soaking...

4 oz blanched almonds (buy them readymade)
2/3 c. white wine vinegar
cinnamon stick
2 lbs onions
4 T olive oil
1 t sugar
1 t salt
32 oz. vegetable stock
6 slices French or Italian bread
a few ounces Gruyere (or Emmentaller or Swiss) cheese

1.Crush the almonds (in mortar or food chopper) and leave them to soak in the vinegar with the cinnamon stick for about one hour.

2.One hour later: finely chop the onions and fry in the oil until translucent.

3.Rinse the almonds in a sieve and add to the onions.

4.Add the sugar, salt and stock, bring to a boil, then turn down the heat and simmer for half an hour. Soup's done at this point -- if you're not ready to serve, just set it aside and reheat it just before the next step. Careful not to cook it down so much that you're left with mostly onions.

5.Toast the slices of bread, place a slice in each dish and pour over the onion soup.

6.Sprinkle grated cheese on top of each bowl and serve. Lovely with a fresh spring salad!

--Mary Anne Mohanraj

Finger Foods

I've always had a fetish for fingers -- long strong sexy fingers that know exactly what to do, where to touch you just right, how to make you moan with delight with just their caress. Somehow this translates into my love for finger foods -- my favorite restaurant in Denver is a Morrocan place called Mataam Fez, where you sit on the floor and eat every course with your fingers, preferably in the private back room with a lover or two.

I have a dozen or so great finger-food recipes, for after the theater, after skiing, before a big game, after an afternoon of love, watching the sunset on the patio...you name it. You can make a few and call them hor-d'euvres, or consider them a complete light meal, or you can serve them with something heartier like a 7- layer dip (refried beans, guacamole, sour cream, onions, green chilies, diced tomatoes, and lots of grated cheese) & chips and call it supper (still vegetarian, still finger-foods, yet completely filling!). They're all very easy to make, yet people always remember them because they`re delicious and fun. There are no complex Martha Stewart techniques involved (how could anyone who follows her recipes ever have time for sex?) . Here's three that melt in your mouth, and are perfect for feeding to your lover with your slow sexy fingers.

Spinach Squares

4 ounces butter
3 eggs
1 cup flour
1 cup milk
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking powder
1 pound Monterey Jack cheese, grated
4 cups chopped, fresh spinach

Melt butter in 9 x 13 baking pan. Beat eggs. Add flour, milk, salt and baking powder. Add cheese and spinach and mix well. Spread the mixture into the pan and bake at 350 degrees for 35 minutes. Cool 30 minutes before serving. Cut into squares. Makes 40 squares (these will freeze well in plastic bags also).

Hot Artichoke Rounds

1 cup mayonnaise
1 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1 4 ounce can green chiles, chopped
1 cup artichoke hearts, chopped
Melba toast rounds (or any kind of small cocktail bread)

Mix mayonnaise, Parmesan cheese, green chiles and artichoke hearts together. Put a spoonful of the mixture on bite-sized toast rounds. Put under broiler a few minutes until lightly browned on top.

Cheese Wrapped Grapes

1 8 ounce package cream cheese, softened
1 8 ounce package sharp grated Cheddar cheese
1/2 cup butter, softened
1 tablespoon prepared mustard
1/2 tsp Worcestershire sauce
Large fresh red seedless grapes
Paprika
Walnuts or pecans, chopped

Beat together cheeses, butter, mustard and Worcestershire sauce. With damp hands, form mixture around each grape. Roll each ball in paprika and then the chopped nuts. Chill before serving.

--Susannah Indigo

Orvino Almond Biscotti

These cookies are aphrodisiac because of their final shape, the eggs and almonds, the way they moisten and soften so beautifully in coffee. Getting one's hands in to mix and form the dough is a pleasure. And the biscotti are fun to make because they take such slow care and timing, like making love.

3 eggs
1 cup sugar
1 stick (1/4 lb.) butter
1 teasp. pure vanilla extract
1 teasp. almond extract
3 cups unbleached flour
3 teasp. baking powder
1/2 cup slightly roasted almonds

I buy organic whole raw almonds and roast them on a cookie sheet ahead of time. Roasted almonds are handy to have for banana splits, adding to stir fry, and so on. The degree to which you roast the nuts depends on how dark you want them to be in the cookie. I usually roast them until they smell good. After the almonds are cool, I chop them. My mother cut them in half or thirds only, but I find that slicing/chopping them smaller makes the biscotti easier to cut.

Beat the eggs, sugar, almond extract and vanilla extract with a fork and let stand. In a large bowl, measure the flour and baking powder and mix well. If the butter is hard, you can cut it into the flour mixture with a pastry cutter before you add the egg mixture. Otherwise, moosh all the ingredients together by hand and add just enough flour to be able to get the dough off your fingers. Mix in the chopped almonds. Divide the dough in half and form two rolls (make them the length of the cookie sheet). (Use the paper from the butter to grease the pan.) Place the "logs" of dough on the cookie sheet and then flatten them with your fingers until they are about half an inch thick. Don't put them too close together. Bake at 350° until lightly browned (15-20 minutes). Remove from pan to a cutting board and slice with a bread knife on a slight diagonal about 1/2 to 3/4 inch thick. Cut while still hot; use a cloth or pot holder to grasp cookie loaf. Return to the pan, cut side down, (you will now need two pans) and brown on both sides in a cooler oven (about 275°). Watch carefully. Don't rush this toasting process or the biscotti will be soft!

Now, grind the espresso beans, get out the French press, and enjoy dipping your fresh almond biscotti in a steaming cup of coffee.

--Jennie Orvino

APPLE TATIN

Is having a dessert that's almost entirely apples a bit like sticking with the missionary position when there's a whole buffet of other activities to engage in? Perhaps, but done right, the simplest things can be exquisite.

8 spy apples
(if you are among the luckless few who can't get spy apples, try either Ida Reds, or one of the following: Cortland, Crispin, or Empire)
1 tbsp grated orange rind
1/4 tsp allspice
3/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup raisins (optional)
2 tbsp butter

1. preheat oven to 250f (120c).

2. Peel, core and thinly slice apples. Toss with allspice and orange rind.

3. In a 9 in round cake pan, place apples in thin even layers with the round side of slices against the edge of the pan, then fill in the middle and any other gaps. Sprinkle with sugar and raisins and dot with butter as you go. Apples will come about 1 in above the rim of the cake pan and will shrink as they cook. Cover with foil and place on a baking sheet in the oven.

4. bake for 5 hours. Turn off the oven and remove the foil and let cool in oven. Remove and invert onto a plate with a slight rim to collect any juices.

Serves 8

The apples will have fallen into a dark brown mass and can be cut like a cake when cooled. Serve with cinnamon or vanilla ice cream or for a special treat, fresh whipped cream -- very yummy. And just think of all the things you can get up to in the 5 hours it takes to bake!

--Nola Summers

Pasta & Pesto with Salad for Two

I can't begin to tell you how much more sensual and enjoyable my love life, and life, in general, has been since I started cooking. It's been goodbye fast food and additives, hello slow and delicious. And recent statistics are showing, I'm not alone. More and more people are eating at home and those that are going out, are checking out places like The Olive Garden to eat healthy. How cool!

The two main things to remember for sensual food preparation are: fresh ingredients and fresh herbs and spices. When I invite someone special over for a romantic dinner, part of the whole experience is in the preparation. The aroma of fresh ingedients cooking and the rich blend of fresh herbs whets the appetite for something delicious for dinner...and after!

If you want someone to feel extra special, don't pre-cook your meal and heat it up in the microwave. Invite them into the kitchen doorway and let them watch as you lovingly put everything together. If you're a enthusiastic and creative chef, they'll figure you make love that way, too!

First of all, don't rush. Slamming pots and pans around like a short- order cook may impress truckers wanting a speedy breakfast, but for a romantic dinner, stay cool, calm, and casual.

Here's a simple vegetarian recipe for two that should have you both melting during dinner and ready for some TLC for dessert.

First, get a nice pot of water boiling. For a professional type touch, sprinkle just a tiny bit of salt in the palm of one hand and holding it high above the water, let it sprinkle into the water. When the water is boiling, take up a bundle of fettucine, aproximately a diameter of one and one-quarter inch. Hold the pasta at one end and put the other end in the water, letting it slowly bend in the heat until it coils in the pot. Then stir it a couple of times to loosen the strands.

Now, in a large non-stick pan, bring a couple of teaspoons of virgin olive oil up to heat. You'll know it's the right temperature when you splash just a drop of water from your finger and the oil sizzles. While the oil is heating, you're finely chopping a couple of cloves of garlic, a green onion or two (with the green tops), and maybe a small green serrano chile pepper for extra spice. Sprinkle a little Italian herb mixture (rosemary, basil, and oregano) between your fingers into the oil when it's hot, then push the garlic, onion, and chile off the cutting board into the pan and stir it a couple of times. Now slice and chop up a medium-sized tomato and add to the pan, ocassionally stirring. Voila! You're making pesto for the pasta!

While occasionally stirring the pasta and pesta, you can rinse your cutting board and get ready to make the salad. Take fresh spinach by the handful and make lengthwise cuts, then turn the spinach and cut again for bite-sized bits. Put a handful each into individual salad bowls or on plates. Now, you can add crumbled blue, feta, or some other creamy cheese, a green chile pepper, chopped green onion, or even, for that special Italian flavor, pine nuts! Mix up a little white vinegar and olive oil and drizzle over the salads.

Strain the fettucine, divide on the dinner plates and scoop the pesto over it. Serve the fettucine and salads and there you are!

--William Dean

Asparagus-Tomato Salad

I grew up in southern Illinois, surrounded by woods and fields and creeks, blissfully ignorant of the commercialism and factory-driven modality of the food industry as we know it today.

I was the sort of barefoot kid who spent the whole day outdoors, rain or shine, and howled with dismay when it was time to go in for the night or scrub up for school. It just felt _right_ to be out somewhere with my toes curling into sun-warmed grass or mud, with the breeze on my face and trees rustling in every direction. My best friends were creatures that dwelled close to the earth, be they trees, bugs, toads, snakes, or interesting rocks I dug up.

My early relationship with food was sensual by nature _and_ necessity. Our family was poor and couldn't afford much, but as luck would have it, my father is a master gardener, like his father, his grandfather, and countless generations before (and like I hope to be as well). Despite poverty, we ate like royalty, and even when we went without electricity, we managed to preserve enough by canning to get comfortably through winter.

Every spring and summer the pasture out back swelled with life. Neat, bushy rows of tomato plants (always far too many for us to eat), onions, green beans, peas, cucumbers, squash, corn, strawberries, okra; apple trees so loaded with fruit, it bent down the branches; grapes and peaches, if we could shoo away the hornets. Asparagus grew by four or five fence posts at the edge of the property, a sensible and protected spot; my father didn't plant it there, but it happily sprouted every year anyway, a remnant of someone who'd lived there long before. (To this day it seems strange to find asparagus in tidy rows in a garden.) At a certain time of year there were mushrooms to be found in the woods, sauteed in butter in a cast-iron skillet, and eaten with our fingers. The beehives out back yielded so many treasures; the honey was amazing to begin with, but to watch these tiny soldiers cross-pollinate fruit trees and wild flowers, year after year, and to reap the benefits, was an educational experience that still leaves me in awe.

The beauty of a life like this, though it's far removed from the comforts of city or suburb life, is the simplicity and complexity of feeling one's place in an ecosystem. I grew up with a deep sense of connectedness to all of life and the passing of seasons, death and decomposition, rebirth and bounty. We coexisted with nature, as well as we could, and it took darned good care of us.

This simple dish, reminiscent of South Italian technique, is a celebration of that relationship, a feast for the eyes and teeth as well as the tongue. It also celebrates life in another sense: these vegetables are loaded with nutrients, and the olive oil is fabulously heart-healthy.

The sensuality I associate with each ingredient has always kept me from identifying specific quantities -- if I'm in the mood for extra tomatoes, or a mound of asparagus, or a bit less onion, I indulge without the implied guilt of deviating from a specific recipe. And don't let _anyone_ tell you asparagus is undesirable until you've tried the real thing.. fresh, barely cooked, crunchable asparagus has a mild and almost sweet flavor, a completely different experience from the bitter glop found in cans or freezer packets.

Procure the following, however much or little as you need:

Asparagus, fresh and raw; choose young shoots if at all possible. The larger and older they get, the tougher the stalks become.
Cherry tomatoes, vine-ripened, the right size to pop into your mouth and burst with your teeth.
A bell pepper; I prefer a yellow one, for its sweetness as well as its color contrast.
A red onion, for its mildness and color
A light vinegar, preferably a white wine variety. (You can experiment with other vinegars, of course, but I find that red wine, cider, balsamic, and the like tend to be overwhelming in this dish.)
A bit of high-quality olive oil, to wake up and complement the flavors Tarragon, dried or fresh
Sea salt; extracted from sea water, it is said to have a better flavor than other salt varieties, perhaps due to mineral content.

Cut the asparagus into two- or three-inch pieces. Blanch it for one or two minutes, maximum -- in other words, drop it into boiling water for one or two minutes, then remove it immediately and "shock" it in ice-cold water. (It can also be cooked longer or even left raw, but neither of these brings out its flavor quite so perfectly. Also, if you prefer it more well-done, be mindful of the effect this will have on the texture. This salad is best with plenty of crunch.)

Cut the cherry tomatoes into halves (to let the juices escape), the bell pepper into chunks, and the red onion into extra-thin strips or circles.

Tumble the ingredients together in a large bowl. Season with the vinegar, olive oil, tarragon, and sea salt to your liking. If you haven't guessed it already, part of the fun is tasting it -- alone or with the one you intend to share it with -- as you go along. More generous splashes of oil will result in a richer dish that will gleam all the more on forks and lips; more vinegar will provide a bit more tang.

Serve at room temperature or slightly chilled. If you can let it marinate for a couple of hours before eating, so much the better.

As a side dish, this salad will go with nearly any summer entree, though I freely admit bias. As a light vegetarian main course, it goes perfectly with a crusty Italian bread, a bit of fine, full-flavored cheese, and cool glasses of iced tea, spring water, or white wine, perhaps a German Riesling.

--Kell Brannon

Chicken and Sun-dried Tomatoes Sauce for Pasta

For decadence, butter and cream. For flavor, the musky accents of garlic and shallots, the sweetness of sugar, and the acid of wine. For sensuality, the fragrance of simmering sun-dried tomatoes infusing your kitchen. For your pleasure, savory nuggets of flesh and blood-red bites of fruit among noodles oozing with sticky glisten.

1 3-oz. package sun-dried tomatoes, rinsed
2 cups chicken broth
1 lb chicken breast fillets, cut into bite-sized pieces
4 tbs. butter
1/4 tsp. white pepper
1 large shallot, minced
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 tsp. light brown sugar
1/4 cup red wine
1 cup heavy cream
1/2 cup parsley, chopped
1 lb. fettuccine

Bring the chicken broth to a boil. Pour it over the tomatoes and let them steep for 15 minutes. Strain and reserve the chicken broth. Rinse and reserve the tomatoes.

Melt the butter in a medium-sized skillet over medium heat. Sauté the chicken until the pinkness is gone, sprinkling it with the white pepper and salt to taste. Add the shallot and garlic and sauté until they are soft and fragrant. Add the tomatoes and sauté briefly. Sprinkle the brown sugar over the tomatoes and stir. Add the reserved chicken broth and the red wine. Stir well and heat until boiling. Lower the heat and stir in the heavy cream. Simmer gently, stirring occasionally, for 30 minutes.

Meanwhile cook the pasta until al dente. Drain the pasta and return it to the pot. Add the remaining 2 tbs. butter and stir until melted. Add the sauce and the parsley and stir well. Serve immediately.

--Julian Robinson

Aphrodisiac Mussels

Mussels, onions, garlic and saffron are all reputed aphrodisiacs. Mix them together in a buttery white wine sauce, and you'll feel like you're eating pure sex. Sexiest of all, it's quick and simple.

3 lb. mussels
2 c. white wine
2 large cloves garlic, peeled and chopped
1 medium onion, minced, or the equivalent in shallots
1/4 teaspoon saffron threads
1/4 cup olive oil
4 tablespoons butter
3 tablespoons chopped parsley
black pepper to taste

Set your lover to peeling and chopping while you scrub the mussels and pull off their "beards". (They really do look and smell pornographic-- even more so when they're cooked and open up. That's probably why they're known as aphrodisiacs.)

In a large skillet, heat the olive oil to medium and add the garlic, onion, saffron and parsley. Cook and stir until the onion is soft and transparent. And the wine and the butter, with a few good twists of pepper from the grinder, and bring just to a boil.

Add the mussels and cook at a low boil until they open (should take 3-5 minutes). If the mussels don't all fit in the pan, cook half, remove with a slotted spoon and cook the other half, then throw them all back together. Discard any mussels that don't open.

Sit on the floor with one big bowl between you. Wiggle or flip the mussels out of their shells and dip them in the sauce. Sip sauce out of the shells, feed it to each other, lap it up. Mop up with crusty bread. Grab each other and make love amid the scents of shellfish, onion, saffron, and garlic.

--Roberta Carwin

Drinks!

Creamy Grasshopper

A wonderful drink when sitting by the fire...or relaxing on the patio...or lounging in bed. Excellent year-round drinking!

2oz Irish Creme liqueur (I've always used Bailey's but I think that's just out of habit!)
3/4oz Creme de Menthe
2oz cream (optional)

Blend ingredients in a shaker with ice. If you like drinks a little milder, add in cream or milk (just don't use skim!). Shake and strain into chilled glasses (if you forgot to pop the glasses into the fridge before hand, simply fill them with ice and let them sit while you fix the drinks). Wonderfully smooth and minty! Yum!

Citrus Martini Coolers

A fabulous drink for hot sunny days and warm summer nights!

2 oranges, 2 limes and 2 lemons cut into thin slices
2 cups citrus vodka
splash of dry vermouth
2 cups orange juice
I can (8oz) tonic water
I cup lime cordial (is there any kind *other* than Rose's?)

Toss the fruit into a pitcher and add in the vodka and vermouth. Muddle with a spoon and let sit for about 15 minutes. Add in the remaining ingredients, stir and add ice....pour into glasses (perhaps garnished with a slice of fruit) and drink! The best parts are the infused slices of fruit.

--Laura Matheson

Our permanent collection of sexuality articles