by Kristine Hawes

Dildo. The word conjures giggles from women and a smirk from men. It's a funny word, not to be mentioned in polite company. Foofa! Dildoes have been around for thousands of years. There are depictions on Roman oil lamps of women pleasuring themselves with penis replicas. Indian art is resplendent with women teaching other women the art of sexual pleasure using stone and wood lingams. No other sex toy is as immediately recognizable as the dildo.

For clarification, a dildo is a rubber, silicone, wood, or stone representation of the male genitalia. It may have an attached scrotum or it may not. It may be totally representational, down to the veins and coloring, or it may be hot pink and non-representational. Women searching for a good dildo today may find a wide range of materials, textures, colors, and even scents. Vibrators, on the other hand, are vibrating sex toys which may or may not be representative of male genitalia. For the purposes of this review, we will only focus on those dildoes which are non-vibrating.

Of the materials available, rubber and silicone are the most widely used for manufacturing dildoes. Each has its advantages and disadvantages. Rubber is very inexpensive and holds up to use well. On the down side, it can taste funny, smell petroleum-like, and they must be cleaned very well. They have difficulty holding color at times. Rubber also has a difficult time retaining body heat. What starts off cold may stay cold. Silicone is an ideal material for dildoes. It is resilient, retains body heat and is easy to clean. It, like rubber, comes in a variety of color choices. It may not hold up to intense stress well -- one tiny tear and it's all over, and the price, well, the price is a little on the high side. What may cost $10 in rubber will likely cost $30 in silicone. However, in terms of feel, texture choices, taste, and scent, silicone is by far the best.

When shopping for a dildo, it's important to think about your or your partner's likes and dislikes, preferences on size and shape. A lot of women find the representational dildoes distasteful. If that is the case, select one that is a suitable shape for insertion but looks nothing like a penis. Some of these types even come with different, science-fiction looking colors and protrusions. Have fun, experiment, shop around. You may be surprised at what you find. We have reviewed two of each type of dildo: two rubber, two silicone. We've also reviewed two double dildoes. All of these may be used with or without a harness, with the exception of one of the double dildoes.

All of these dildoes may be found at Good Vibrations. Pictures courtesy of the Good Vibrations web site.

Dual Jewel

This dildo is almost non-representational. Each end has a small knob on it, but it doesn't really appear like the ridge on a penis. One end of this rosy double dildo is short and stocky, the other is long and slender. This arrangement is ideal for someone who wants variety at a low cost. Some couples may use this if one enjoys things thin and long, and the other stocky and shorter. In terms of individual use, this is very good for men who want to start off with something small and work up to something fatter. The stocky end actually makes a great handle for vigorous sex with the longer end -- either solo or with a partner. The slender end is very good for beginning anal sex.

On the minus side, the color, especially the violet end (the stocky end), has a tendency to stain other rubber dildoes it comes in contact with. It's best if this particular dildo is kept separate from other rubber dildoes. It has the standard, rubbery taste and the rubber may be difficult to clean. If you intend on using both ends on multiple partners, condoms would make this a much easier piece to use. Unfortunately, condoms sag some on the slender end and must be held in place with your hand.

Overall, this is a good piece to use for almost any type of sex and is a good staple for a toy box. It retails for approx. $18.00.

Don Juan

This is a monster. We reviewed the Don Juan 8" and it's huge. Women who want a big dildo, this is the one!

It is a very representational dildo, complete with slightly blued veins and a life-like scrotum. It comes with a suction cup that may be inserted into the end of the dildo. It may then be adhered to walls, floors, or any other flat surface that will hold tension. The colors include vanilla, coffee, and chocolate.

A great many women read the 8" size and the 1 7/8" diameter and think, that's not so big. Wrong! In the experience of one reviewer, it was the largest penis (or close to it!) she had ever seen. Really think hard before you select this one, no pun intended. The advantage is its size and its look. It looks like a real penis. Its size is such that it will fulfill almost any need for a large member.

On the down side, it's so large that the suction cup is almost useless. It did work well on a flat horizontal plane, but stuck to a shower wall did not work. Another disadvantage is the size of the scrotum and use with a harness. Because it is so thick in the scrotum, its length is diminished quite a bit when used with a harness, which pulls the dildo very close to the body. A better use for this is manual insertion. But be careful! One reviewer's partner became a little enthusiastic and she was sore the next day.

The cost for either size of this dildo is around $48.00. This is a fairly good price for something so life-like and large.

Little Pal

This is the smallest dildo we've found which did not fall into the anal plug category. It comes in several colors. It's very straight, slightly representational, with a ridged head and some slight, angled carvings down the shaft. Made of silicone, its texture is smooth, with a soft, unpolished feel to the shaft. The base is flared nicely and flat -- great for harness use.

This is a very small dildo for a lot of people. It is great, however, for anal sex. Women or men may use it on either and all will find it comfortable. Because it's silicone, heat retention is very good and it warms up quickly. Its smooth nature and unobtrusive head make it very nice for anal play. Some women who would like to have their male partners penetrate them vaginally and anally will find this particular dildo very handy.

Because it's small, it may be great for beginning sexual play but it may become "not enough" for further play. Its short length may make it difficult for some women to penetrate their partners as well -- one reviewer found it difficult to see exactly where she should place the head -- it was just too short in the harness!

For people who want to use a dildo with anal sex, and want silicone -- this is an excellent choice. At $28.00, it's also in the more reasonable range of silicone dildoes.

Nexus

This is a beautiful dildo. Its sleek black and white marbled color appeals to the eyes just as the scythe-like form appeals to the body. At just over $85.00, it is one of the most expensive dildoes on the market today -- and quite possibly worth every penny. It's a double dildo that really, really works.

Each end of this sculpted dildo is separately crafted: wear it in a harness -- one end curves perfectly to fit you while the other stands poised for fumble-free penetration. We did not have any male couples review this, so it is difficult to say whether or not they would be able to use it. The form is such that the woman must insert it in herself first, then slip on the harness and fit it over the end. The flared middle section keeps it firmly in place against her body. Because of the dual insertion nature of the Nexus, it moves even less than the best based single dildoes.

The best part of the Nexus is the fact that whatever movement you attempt during sexual play, you feel immediately within yourself. It may not be a deep penetration, but it is a satisfying one. There are small knobs sculpted into the base of the wearer's side which make for incredible clitoral stimulation. The size of the penetration end (the one for your partner) may be a little on the big side for most men to begin with, especially if they aren't used to anal sex. One reviewer said it was "something he needed to work up to." However, this is one dildo that female couples may immediately enjoy.

Comments or questions? Feel free to drop me a line at products@cleansheets.com.